has it really been 15 days?

???
wow, how much can happen in that time?
alot. a lifetime.
I'm sad today. I'm not where I want to be. I have no choice. And that makes me sadder.
Today Gerald's family helped bury his step-mother Ella. She died on July 2. She was only married to Gerald's dad (George) for little over a year. Gerald and I are not there. We are here. In Cary. Because we are trying to become citizens of a country we have grown to love as our own.
Our pastor started a new series on suffering....who knew a year ago when he planned it, that it would resonate so loudly in our community. Jonathan asked our community to write on the walls (covered with butcher paper) our hurt, our suffering. So many people got up.
I am not suffering like some. I have a strong marriage, great kids, no finacial struggles, no past regrets....but I am suffering. My heart is heavy with the weight of being so far from the family I love. What if this had been my mother? My father? What will I do when the time comes for them to go to heaven and I haven't seen them since Christmas? I'm sad. But I'm not without hope. I know I have the hope of the resurrection and I will see Ella again. I will see all my parents again. I have a chance to be more intentional with the people I love that are still here.
I have that choice.
And that makes me happy.